[MUD-Dev] The Automated Online Role-Player

[Michael Tresca]

From: http://www.gamespy.com/fargo/august03/autorpg/index.shtml

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The Automated Online Role-Player
It's indistinguishable from live humans!
By Dave "Fargo" Kosak | August 22, 2003

The Autocamp 2000 is ergonomically designed to kill steal and loot
corpses.  (Actual photo.)Sure, I love Star Wars Galaxies, the
massively multiplayer RPG. I've written about it on several
occasions. But I'm past that point where I can dedicate my life to a
single game. I'm a very important businessman who does very
important business with very important people at very important
social engagements, such as watching softcore anime with the dudes
in the apartment across from mine.

But, I still want to keep playing. And I want to WIN. I know, I
know, the hardcore among you are saying, "But Fargo, you can't 'win'
an online RPG.  That defeats the purpose." To which I respond: I
LIVE to defeat purposes.

And besides, like it or not, people do try to "win" massively
multiplayer RPGs. The rules of engagement are something like this:

  If there is a status bar, make it grow bigger

  If there is a number, make it higher

  If it moves, either get a mission from it or kill it

Which got me to thinking: What if I were to unload the boring parts
of an MMOG off to someone else? For instance, I love running a
business in Star Wars Galaxies, but it's hard to find the time or
the patience to work on my combat skillz. What if someone ELSE
played that part of the game for me?

My first impulse -- to use a room full of small Korean children --
turned out to be a real nightmare. They kept whining and crying and
pointing to their mouths or empty bellies. Who knows what they
wanted? I don't speak Korean. Similarly, they didn't understand me
when I pointed to the computer monitor and said "Lewt! LEWT!" no
matter how loud I shouted it. Clearly I needed a new plan.

Introducing the Autocamp 2000

And so I turned my attention toward robots! Longtime readers may
remember when I subtly and successfully used a robot to write my
column while I camped in a mall waiting for Diablo II to come out. A
similar process could easily play online games for me. After all, I
minored in computer science at a prestigious Liberal Arts
institution. The hardest part of any project such as this is
figuring out the algorithm, but here it is, in its entirety:

The Autocamp 2000 Plays Online RPGs with the following rules:

  Join any group that invites you
  When in a group, follow behind the leader
  Attack any monster you see
  Accept all trade requests from other players, then give them a melon

Well, that takes care of 90% of online play. All I would need to do
is stick my character -- Farglik the Mon Calamari -- in a cantina
with a backpack full of melons (ah, sweet delicious fruit!). When I
checked on him a week later he'd be what they call "uber." But
before I got started I had to tackle the tricky part: interaction
with other players. If my automated Farglik didn't respond to
players who talked to him in a meaningful way, the proverbial jig
would be up.

One option was to have my robot randomly bark at people in Mandarin
Chinese.  But I opted for a much more graceful algorithm:

The Autocamp 2000 talks to other players with following rules:

  If someone says something ending in a question mark, respond by
  saying "Dude?"

  If someone says something ending in an exclamation point, respond
  by saying "Dude!"

  If someone says something ending with a period, respond by
  randomly saying one of three things: "Okie," "Sure," or "Right
  on."

    EXCEPTION: If someone says something directly to you by
    mentioning your name, respond by saying "Lag."

The many succinct expressions of the Autocamp 2000.(And remember to
accept all trade requests from other players by giving them a
melon.)

My robot was programmed and ready to go. Hell, if I programmed it to
randomly shout "Gimmie buffs!" it would probably pass the turing
test.  Satisfied, I sat it in front of the keyboard, made sure my
character had at least fifty melons in his backpack, and then
trudged off to leave it alone for the night.

My character, Farglik the Mon Calamari, waited around in the Cantina
for some adventurers. The following is a log of what transpired:

  KillSwitch: [Shouting] Does anyone want to join our hunting party?

  Farglik: [Powered by the Autocamp 2000] Dude?

  [KillSwitch invites Farglik to join the group.]

  [Farglik joins the group]

  KillSwitch: We're gonna go hunt wrixes.

  Farglik: Right on.

    [The group of players runs out of the Cantina, Farglik following
    close behind. Farglik shoots at every little monster they pass.]

  KillSwitch: Why are you attacking the durneys?

  Farglik: Dude?

  KillSwitch: The durneys, the little bunny things -- why do you
  keep shooting at them?

  Farglik: Dude?

  Troobacca: [A wookie in the party] My weapon powerup expired, I
  need a new one.

  Farglik: Sure.

    [Troobacca opens a trade with Farglik.]  [Farglik hands him a
    melon.]

  Troobacca: ...what's this?

  Farglik: Dude?

  Troobacca: You handed me a melon!

  Farglik: Dude!

  KillSwitch: Knock it off guys, I see some wrixes up ahead. Let's
  do this.

  Farglik: Right on.

    [The group encounters a bunch of dangerous wrixes, but they gang
    up and shoot every one of them.]

  KillSwitch: We rock!

  Farglik: Dude!

  Troobacca: We so OWNED them!

  Farglik: Dude!

  KillSwitch: Uh oh, hang on. Up ahead are some Sharnaff bulls. We
  can't handle them, so don't shoot.

  Farglik: Okie.

    [Confusion in the ranks.[Farglik shoots one of the Sharnaff
    bulls.  The bull attacks; Trobacca and several other party
    members are killed before they beat it.]

  KillSwitch: You IDIOT! Farglik why did you shoot at them?

  Farglik: Lag.

  KillSwitch: Well don't do it again.

  Farglik: Sure.

    [Farglik shoots at another Sharnaff bull.  The entire party is
    slaughtered except for Farglik.]

Sweet, delicious melons! Ripe, nutritious, and nearly impossible to
nerf.

    [ ... Farglik stands there, alone, for several hours ... ]

    [ ... finally, a merchant runs up to him.]

  Stingrie: [A Rodian merchant.] Hey man! Would you like to buy a
  stimpack?

  Farglik: Dude?

  Stingrie: A stimpack. It boosts your health by 200 points. I'll
  sell it to you for 500 credits.

  Farglik: Okie.

    [Stingrie opens a trade session.]
    [Farglik hands him a melon.]

  Stingrie: What the hell is this?

  Farglik: Dude?

  Stingrie: You handed me a melon.

  Farglik: Right on.

  Stingrie: I told you 500 credits!

  Farglik: Dude!

  Stingrie: If it's too expensive, just say so.

  Farglik: Sure.

    [Stingrie runs away, angry.]

    [ ... several more hours pass ...]

    [A small hunting party led by Krushmor the Master Rifleman comes
    over the ridge and spots Farglik.]

  Krushmor: Farglik, what's up? What are you doing way out here?

  Farglik: Lag.

  Krushmor: We're rooting dralls out of a cave. You should join our
  group.

  Farglik: Okie.

  "Farglik! Please heal me! I'm about to die!"

    [Krushmor invites Farglik to join the group.]

    [Farglik joins the group and starts following Krushmor around.]

  Soop: [The party's medic]. Here, Farglik, let me hand you some
  stimpacks.

  Farglik: Lag.

  Soop: I know, it's pretty bad tonight. Here you go.

  Farglik: Right on.

    [Soop opens up a trade window and hands Farglik a Stimpack.]

    [Farglik hands Soop a melon.]

  Soop: Uh ... thanks!

  Farglik: Dude!

    [The party enters a cave and spends the next two hours brutally
    clearing it of creatures, room by room. Everyone gets tons of
    XP.]

  Krushmor: Aw man, it's getting really late guys. I should go!

  Farglik: Dude!

  Krushmor: I know, sucks. I'll catch you all later.

  Farglik: Sure.

    [Krushmor logs off. By default, Farglik is now promoted to group
    leader!]

  Soop: Well that sucks. What should we hunt next?

  Farglik: Dude?

  Soop: Let's hunt Slice Hounds!

  Farglik: Dude!

  Soop: I know an awesome spot. Follow me.

  Farglik: Right on.

    [The group runs out of the cave, but Farglik, because he is now
    group leader, just stands there. Several minutes pass before
    Soop returns.]

  Soop: Farglik why didn't you come with us?

  Farglik: Lag.

  Soop: Well catch up when you can.

  Farglik: Okie.

    [Farglik stands motionless in the cave and eventually the group
    disbands.  Half an hour passes.]

The Autocamp 2000 can remain calm in any situation.

    [Suddenly, one of the game developers, controlling Darth Vader,
    enters the cave.]

  Darth Vader: Well, my young padawan, we've been watching your
  progress for quite some time.

  Farglik: Sure.

  Darth Vader: You have done well. We have decided to bestow upon
  you: Force powers!

  Farglik: Okie.

  Darth Vader: You will be the most powerful Jedi on the planet!

  Farglik: Dude!

    [Darth Vader gives Farglik force powers.]

  Darth Vader: Would you like my light saber?

  Farglik: Dude?

  Darth Vader: My light saber. I bestow it onto you.

  Farglik: Right on!

    [Darth Vader opens up a trade and gives Farglik a light saber.]

    [Farglik hands Darth Vader a melon.]

  Darth Vader: Thanks, uh, for the ... melon.

  Farglik: Sure.

  Darth Vader: Well? Aren't you going to try out your new Force powers?

  Farglik: Dude?

  Darth Vader: Your Force powers! The powers I just gave you!

  Farglik: Dude!

  Darth Vader: The FORCE, Farglik! Use the Force!

  Farglik: Lag.

  Darth Vader: Okay, you know what. Just forget the Force
  powers. I'm taking them back.

  Farglik: Okie.

  Darth Vader: And give me back my light saber!

  Farglik: Sure.

    [Farglik hands Darth Vader a melon.]

    [Darth Vader kills Farglik.]

    [Farglik respawns in the cloning facility.]

  KillSwitch: [In the cloning facility] Whoa! Look who just popped
  in. What happened to you, Farglik?

  Farglik: Lag.

  KillSwitch: Want to come hunting with us?

  Farglik: Okie.

    [Farglik and the Autocamp 2000 join the hunt and gain experience
    for several more hours...]

I'd call the experiment an unqualified success.

- Fargo

  [PlanetFargo is posted every Friday on GameSpy.com, infuriating
  everyone involved. Fargo also writes the Daily Victim, so go
  there! Mail Fargo.]
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Mike "Talien" Tresca
RetroMUD Administrator
http://michael.tresca.net
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